In a world where texting has replaced talking and computers have helped to eliminate the need for face to face interaction, it’s important for a person to remember the people who mean the most in his or her life, and take active measures to maintain those relationships. When times get hard, close friends and family members are the only ones usually left to pick you back up, but if you’ve abused the relationship in the past or failed to be their support system when they needed you most, chances are they will eventually do the same to you. Caring for others as you expect them to care for you ensures healthy and long relationships.
It isn’t always easy to put the giving before the taking. While Thomas Hobbes may have been a little off when he automatically assumed all men and women were born selfish, those tendencies do emerge from time to time. It may be difficult at first to put someone else before yourself, but over time it becomes a rewarding feeling. Not only is it gratifying to see the ones you love happy as a result of something you’ve done, but it cultivates a mutually giving relationship.
There is something truly wonderful about having loved ones depend on you. Though it can certainly be exhausting if you are the one they always turn to, being the rock everyone can lean against means they trust and love you above everyone else. It means that you play an active role in their happiness, a position that is extremely important and should be handled with love and care.
Besides it being morally good to give rather than take, giving sets the tone for the relationship. When you need someone to turn to, you want to rely on those around you to support you and provide the care and love you provided to them. The chances of people sticking around when times get hard is significantly increased if they feel as if you would do the same for them. While this shouldn’t motivate the decisions you make in your relationships, it should be what keeps you from making bad choices and negating the responsibilities you have as a close friend or family member.
Most people don’t realize that being someone’s close friend does come with a set of responsibilities. These responsibilities need to be fulfilled on both ends if the relationship is expected to survive. “Do unto others as you would have them do to you” is the golden rule that has lasted the test of time. Regardless of the religion you follow or your belief system, it is rule to live by if you wish to keep the people you care about close. Before you make any decisions or say anything that could be taken the wrong way, stop and consider whether or not you would appreciate it being said or done to you. Caring for the people who care for you isn’t just about what you can give them, but also what you can refrain from doing for the love of them.
This article was contributed by Boulder dermatologist Mountain View Dermatology who specializes in varicose vein removal.